Brendan Jordan a two year Enigma wrapped in a mystery
Just where did the Brendan Jordan fella come from? I'd like to learn more about the man that is Brendan Jordan, what's his background, his family life, did he in fact rescue all those hostages from the Lybian mind erasing camps? I think the world demands answers here.
Brendan Jordan is a son of a bitch. He found the cure for cancer, but lost it in a poker game. He's 10 feet tall and wears bedsheets for pants. He invented the microwave. He slept with my wife, made me watch, and I liked it.
He's won the Indy 500, stormed the beaches in Normandy and fathered 8 children. He eats a jar of pickles a day. He was Chinese for a week. He uses piano wire to floss. His stool weighs 12 pounds.
He was the inspiration for Indiana Jones. His brain is insured for 2 million dollars. He was once a bouncer for Stuido 54. He was a hand-model for Dove soap. He's running for president in 2004. He trains white bengal tigers.
One time I was with Brendan Jordan in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Brendan Jordan goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Brendan Jordan! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'brendanjordan' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer!